Industry News
These 5 Restaurant Reviews Are So Bad, They're Good.
We rounded up some of the funniest bad restaurant reviews we could find for your viewing pleasure. Plus, learn some key takeaways on how to handle bad reviews.
At Akira, we have a mission to improve guest sentiment and experience for restaurants.
But we also like to have a little fun and lighten the mood, especially around the stress of the holidays and as we edge closer towards the end of Q4.
We know bad reviews happen to good restaurants. So our team scoured the internet for some of the best, and funniest bad restaurant reviews we could find.
Read on for some laughs, and some A+ commentary (subjectively speaking, of course) from yours truly.
1. The hilariously bad analogies review
Talk about a literary genius. This on-slaught of worst case scenarios is enough to drive California sober people to drink.
The best part? They don't even mention one thing about the restaurant other than their utter discontent for it.
The restaurant should take this review for a grain of salt, and know that it actually does more to pique a potential guest's interest about what type of torture chamber awaits them.
PRO TIP: To learn from restaurants who are thriving at online reputation management, check this out.
2. The "Would you like your milkshake boiled?" review:
While the owner of Milkshake City didn't find this review very funny, it's hard not to get a chuckle out of it, especially when the name of the restaurant is "The Milkshake City".
I generally believe the customer is always right, unless they want you to boil their milkshake. That's just wrong…and sounds like food poisoning waiting to happen.
This is exactly why using a reputation management platform like Akira is so valuable—you need to take this conversation offline to understand if this guest is actually one stop away from Crazy Town or if this is just a big misunderstanding.
PRO TIP: To learn how to effectively take reviews like the above offline to resolve and hopefully get them to update it, check out A Step-By-Step Guide To Responding To Bad Google Reviews.
3. The folded-pizza debacle
As an Italian-American, I am deeply offended that Jenny doesn't know the difference between a pizza and a calzone. But as a potential customer reading this review, I would laugh it off as a big misunderstanding and still give this restaurant a try.
In general, the restaurant's response was perfectly fine. But their grammar? About as fine as a folded pizza. I applaud the owner for their efforts here, but this is why having a process in place to properly review and respond is key.
PRO TIP: Looking to get a strategy in place to effectively manage your restaurant's reputation? Here's everything you need to know.
4. The salty surname clapback
Yikes. While I give the owner an A for his epic clapback, he gets an F when it comes to reputation management. Look, this George guy sounds like a "Karen" (sorry in advance to anyone named Karen).
But restaurant owners need to resist the urge to get triggered. At the end of the day, responses like this just make the restaurant seem as petty as George the complainer.
PRO TIP: Here is the right way to respond to George Complainer.
5. McDonald's "I'm no muggle, where are my muggets?" review
This bad review is hilarious, but the typo is killing me. But at least it led me to think of a good Harry Potter reference.
This would have been such a great opportunity for the McDonald's location to have a little fun, all while fixing this mishap. At the very least, they should have responded with an apology.
Final thoughts: These reviews prove the need for a reputation management platform
The above proves one thing—online review sites have become the wild, wild west. And if restaurants want to reel them in, they need a reputation management platform.
Lucky for you, that's what we've been busy building at Akira. It's already working magic for many well-known QSR's.